SlushWire Weekly #14 – April 05, 2026

writingcommunity

When an agent gives you detailed feedback, but another agent still has your full you: A) Start revisions on the feedback B) Wait to hear back from the other agent C) Start working on a new book all together D) Wallow in the swirling bowl self doubt

pubtips

This week’s class brought to you by Query Shark: https://queryshark.blogspot.com/2024/04/ original content not ours but by queryshark.blogspot.com

10queries

P8 MG Fantasy A lot of telling. I’m not sure if things talked about are current story or backstory and I have little context for it.

10queries

P7 MG Fantasy Strong scene with sensory detail and tension with a hint at the greater conflict. The last paragraph though seems to take a drastic turn just to introduce plot.

10queries

P6 A Fantasy Action and emotion are compelling and immediately like the MC. But there’s too much extra worldbuilding info packed in that take away from the scene and can be saved for later.

10queries

Q6 A Fantasy A complex story that hasn’t quite been condensed into a pitch. The storylines don’t seem to connect and I’m not sure who either MC is which makes it hard to invest.

10queries

P5 A Fantasy Even after reading the query, I’m unsure what’s happening. The MC is doing something vague, and the story seems to be running off of assumptions I’m not aware of.

10queries

Q5 A Fantasy Really strong logline with an inherent conflict. But it’s unclear what actions the MC will take to solve the problem set up.

10queries

(The real) P4 MG Fantasy Might be starting too late in the story. The Normal World info that made the adventure so exciting is missing so this reads like the opener of any MG novel.

10queries

P4 A Historical These pages creates an atmospheric feel that fits genre. MC’s emotions are felt through style of prose; added sensory detail will make it shine.

10queries

Q3 A Historical This suffers from simply telling us too much of the story. It’s a hard balance between giving us enough info so the main conflict is clear but not so much it feels like we’ve already read the whole story.

writingcommunity

Querying is hard, and sometimes it’s not your story; it’s how you’re presenting it. I’m offering query letter feedback with honest, clear insight on what’s working and what’s not. If you’re not getting responses, feel free to message me. 🤍

literaryagent

Ready, Set, Pitch! *open until Sunday* leave a comment with your best hook. If I want to read more, I’ll reply!

10queries

Alright, here we go #RevPit folks! I’m planning to have both my #10Queries sessions next week on Monday, April 6 & Wednesday, April 8, both at 7 PM ET. See you then!

RevPit

Some editors and agents say straight-up no prologues. Me, I have my preference. I like prologues when they either 1) show us a glimpse from the climax/later part of the book to hook us, or 2) show us our MC(s) through the eyes of a side character Usually it’s safer to start with chapter 1

writingcommunity

It’s pitch time! For the next hour, send me your best hook using #BetancourtLiterary. If I’m intrigued, I may ask to see more.

pubtips

🦈 always good: https://queryshark.blogspot.com/2018/11/ original content not ours but by queryshark.blogspot.com

10queries

10/ ASc – Q: On the high end of adult word count; may be perceived as a lack of self-editing/cutting filter words. P: Beautiful use of senses. Disseminate info conveyed in early paragraphs more naturally rather than using interiority, so it doesn’t feel like non-fiction.

10queries

9/ AF – Q: A detail in the query body immediately conveys this isn’t a Mary Sue. Love! P: The bad thing that happens to people MC cares about are only compelling if we first see MC interacting with them in a “normal day” kind of way. Show us an MC’s everyday before you break it.

10queries

8/ AF – Q: Comps are more compelling when you tell us what aspects of them your novel shared. While you have that info lower down, consider moving to the top rather than having two data paragraphs. P: Amazing use of multiple senses to immerse the reader in these early pages.

10queries

7/ AR – Q: Excellent job laying out two equally compelling choices at the end of the query! P: Always show an MC’s flaw in the first chapter, bc it makes them believable and likeable, but this one may lean a bit too hypocritical based on info provided.

10queries

6/ AFsy – Q: This query lays out the plot too thoroughly. Leave some mystery and end on a choice the MC must make to entice the agent to read. P: When starting off with a quote/excerpt/etc for vibes/info, make it brief, or break it up over multiple chapters.

10queries

5/ ARsy – Q: As agents may be seeking standalones only, leave “series potential” to be discussed on an offer call. Your bio is so fun! It’s a bonus to showcase your personality here. P: Great opener with a balanced mix of action, interiority, dialogue, and emotional physicality.

10queries

4/ AHR – Q: Agents scan for the data paragraph first so put it at the top. We want their 👀 flying down the page, not searching. Great job showcasing essentials in a relatively succinct query. P: Not indenting the first paragraph of a chapter shows you’ve done format research.

10queries

3/ APR – Q: Having a logline at the top isn’t the norm, but this one is so quippy, it enhances. Great job showcasing voice in the query body. P: The first few paragraphs have intriguing info, but are best weaved in via plot/dialogue down the line as too much info breaks immersion.

10queries

2/ YASc – Q: Typos aren’t a big deal, but read your query out loud. Our eyes fill in missing/wrong words when we know our own intent. Stakes are high, but consider ending with a choice. It’s more intriguing. P: Riveting, but there’s quite a bit of repetitiveness.

10queries

1/ YAF – Q: Amazing job showcasing comp attributes your story shares, and WTG including content warnings. Break up large paragraphs. P: Rather than telling us how the MC is feeling, let their emotional physicality fill in that info for the reader.

10queries

Welcome to my 2nd batch of #RevPit #10Queries! Like last time, I’ll post five queries now, and then five more 30 mins later 🙂 Note that these are all only suggestions, though I hope they are widely helpful. Also see my 1st batch posted Wed, and my #RevPitSpoilers thread. All boosts appreciated 🙂

literaryagent

AGENT INTERVIEW: Olivia Emerick of Metamorphosis Literary Agency! Olivia answers some of our most pressing questions and discusses their best advice for authors. Learn more on our blog: writingdayworkshops.com/blog

writingcommunity

If an agency is regretfully turning my project down because they don’t have time, would it be crazy to say “It’s cool I’ll wait.”? Or did they just not want to say “No we don’t want it”? Lol

10queries

Hey #RevPit friends. I’ve been finishing up a client’s project, so I could focus on my #10Queries. Join me on Monday, April 6, 2026, at 6 p.m. for some anonymous insights and feedback on your query letters and first five pages. Let’s see who can guess which one is theirs.

10queries

Hey there! Will you be doing

writingcommunity

Mama raised me not to gatekeep, so: FREE contest for writers of romance and women’s fic over at tinyurl.com/wdwcon9 — Judged by Agent Rachel Beck of Liza Dawson Associates, via @writingdaywksp.bsky.social Winners get an agent critique of their work!

MSWL

I’m still closed to queries, but I hope to reopen in a few months. When I do, I’ll be especially interested in seeing sff novels about transformative friendships. (Romantic elements okay but non-critical here.) Fire up “For Good,” write me something!

writingcommunity

Thursday inbox observation. One of the fastest ways to strengthen pages is to trust the reader. If your character’s intimidating, funny, unstable, seductive, brilliant, terrifying, or deeply unwell, then let them behave that way on the page.

writingcommunity

And another rejection – agent doesn’t connect with my MC in the first 5 pages. Seriously considering scrapping my current first five and starting with my MC in bed with the bar hookup. Who needs character development or being oriented to the world. We’ll start here:

10queries

Thank you for all your amazing notes across two rounds of #10queries. Curious if you came across several dual/multi pov submissions and whether the notes here reflect thoughts on both/multiple povs when they were reflected in the opening pages. 5 pages is too short, but had to ask! 😆

10queries

Hi Dallas! It’s so hard to shrink an entire novel down into 3 paragraphs. Here’s a template to get creative juices flowing: When MC discovers [catalyst], MC must [overcome obstacles] before [ticking bomb] or [stakes]. MC’s opinion about events add voice/personality. 🧵 1 of 2

10queries

P17: There’s info here that belongs in the query. We should cut/trim it here and find space for it in the query so that we can jump right into the story & MC. I think we should start around para 3-4. Wish we had more grounding, but love the characterization so far.

10queries

P16: These pages definitely read on the lower side of MG, almost chapter book, but that’s not bad. I could see this being illustrated. We need a little less telling and more grounding (trust your young readers!) but I like where we’re starting.

10queries

Q16: MG SF I love the concept and the message, but there seems to be no goal here. Even in theme-heavy stories, the MC needs something to accomplish & consequences if they don’t. give young readers the urge to tag along for the ride. I like that the word count is on the lower side

10queries

P16: The pages follow up with the premise and the voice. The only thing I’m unsure about is the introduction into the magic. It feels a little shoehorned in. I think there’s a way we can more naturally tie the MC’s current struggle with this new information…

10queries

P15: Funny first line. After that, like the query, there’s no connection to the MCs. If a reader can’t relate or at least see who a character is, they likely won’t care what happens to them.

10queries

Q15: YA M The wording is confusing, which has muddied the plot. We hold the MCs at arm’s length, so we don’t know their GMC. Not much to hook me so far.

10queries

Tip: On queries – write the query as if these events have happened or are going to happen. Don’t address it as a book, but as a story that’s unfolded. On pages – balance the internal vs external. We should care about both the world and the person leading us through it.

10queries

P14: I can tell the author put a lot of work into crafting the world here, but we get a lot of infodumping in this opening. It reads more like a textbook description than a story opening before we get to the dialogue. We need personal stakes + worldly stakes

10queries

Q14: A F I see this often in queries where the author breaks down the plot and characters as if explaining it to the agent rather than pitching it. Nix “the plot starts with… the characters are…” etc. A query letter should be a punchy pitch that sells the book.

10queries

P13: Good tension near the end, but the opening has a lot of telling. There’s a mix of telling and showing that doesn’t quite balance out, especially with how the MC feels. I think the dialogue here is a missed opportunity to get some good character development and make up for it.

10queries

Q13: YA M I love the stakes and tension here. I think we give a little too much away, though. There’s a big secret that we’re given right up front, and I think withholding that would make this query much stronger & make us eager to dive in to figure it out.

10queries

P12: This reads very procedural. We’re told what has happened and what is happening as if from an outside POV when it’s first person. Need more interiority. Why is the MC here? Why is he doing this dangerous thing?

10queries

Q12: YA SF Q: The concept caught my attention, but summary quickly lost me. We don’t get any stakes. The bio paragraph is longer than the pitch itself. I want to know exactly what the GMC is. As-is, I have no idea where this story is headed.

10queries

P11: I really like this opening, but can’t get a feel of the MC. I think we need a small mention of his goal here, a thread, to make us (if not like him), want to follow him.

10queries

Q11: YA H Sounds so cool! There’s one piece I’m not sure quite fits in here/could be adjusted to let us know how it may tie into the main plot. Also surprised by the age of the characters vs the age of the voice. Wonder if the author would be open to lowering them.

10queries

Anyone up for my second round of #10Queries? 👀 #RevPit A=Adult YA=Young Adult MG=Middle Grade GMC: Goal, Motivation, Conflict F=Fantasy SF=SciFi M=Mystery H=Horror

10queries

It really depends on the manuscript. Sometimes, mss have dual or multi-POVs. The goal is to focus on the Main MC in the query letter, the one who has the biggest impact on the plot and other characters. One MC is often best, but more than 3 in a query letter might be difficult.

10queries

P20 – A R MC clearly struggling, which can help make the MC relatable. Great job working in MC’s want + the obstacles in the way while also grounding the reader in the MC’s world. Adding hints of romance would help establish genre. For example, what are MC’s thoughts about love?

10queries

Q20 – A R Opening line feels like it’s for a different genre. Consider putting the Romance hook first, unless the other genre is more prominent in the manuscript. Then, consider changing genre so the pages match expectations from query. Unclear what draws the LI’s to one another.

10queries

P19 – A R Great voice. Nice interiority that helps reader connect with MC. The thing the MC lacks is clear, as are the things they don’t want (and delivered with humor). Great use of five senses to ground reader in MC’s world. The emotions on the page are wonderfully cringeworthy

10queries

P17 – A R MC starts in precarious situation, but MC isn’t who puts in work to resolve the situation. If the “fix” doesn’t initiate with the MC (if other characters are doing the deciding) it steals agency from the MC. Plot impactful decisions (good or bad) should stem from MC.

10queries

Q18 – A F The premise sounds cool, but there’s some confusion about who’s who. The more characters named in a query, the more work for readers. Home the focus on the MC as much as possible and avoid subplots.

10queries

Q17 – A R A good sense of who MC is + what MC wants & is willing to do to achieve it, but the Love Interests’s personality is hidden behind vague details. Without knowing what draws MC to LI makes the dilemma at end an easy choice. Consider giving more about why MC hooked on LI.

10queries

P16 – A R Opening pages so focused on other characters that it’s difficult to connect to MC until later. Hints of what’s important to MC, but not why. Knowing motivation can help reader care about what happens. Tightening opening will allow more space to keep the spotlight on MC.

10queries

Q16 – A R Reader learns about MC & why they want goal in concise manner with an emotional tug. Love Interest want/motivation also clear. With MC’s goal, the dilemma MC faces feels impossible to resolve. Don’t give away the ending in the query. Keep the mystery to hook reader.

10queries

P15 YA R – Emotional events are happening but since the reader doesn’t know anything about the MC the intended impact falls a little flat. Is this a moment the reader needs to witness or is this scene for the author’s understanding of the MC? Does this start in the right place?

10queries

Q15 YA R – Great job revealing who MC is and what’s important to them. Progress toward goal feels a little too easy, yet makes me curious about what might happen next. Without knowing more about the LI and what draws the MC to them, the dilemma at the end doesn’t feel tough.

10queries

P14 – A R Opening page could use tightening so that reader can meet MC sooner. Love the MC’s sense of humor. So much personality revealed in how MC sees the world around them. MC set on goal, which makes reader want to know how MC will respond to conflict from context clues.

10queries

This isn’t my query, but has me thinking about my first pages… why are they so hard?? Can we give them a break? Allow them to relax a bit and not try to do all the things? That’s not how books work? Sigh… #RevPit P.s. thanks Natasha for making your #10Queries advice widely applicable!

10queries

Q14 – A R Great job bringing the MC’s voice to the query. Showing the decisions MC is making toward a goal helps demonstrate the agency MC will have in pages. Understanding what’s at stake if MC fails at set goal will help amplify the dilemma at the end.

10queries

Q13 – A F Wonderful job establishing genre right up front. MC has clear goal (+ motivation) but it’s unclear how current path might lead to win. May need more context. The link between conflict and MC’s dilemma is also hidden behind vague details.

10queries

P12 – A R It’s unclear where MC is or what MC is doing in the beginning. Pacing is so fast that reader may struggle to visualize the setting at first. Consider adding a few grounding details to establish surroundings. Great job showing reaction to LI & hinting at a future goal.

10queries

P11 A F – MC has clear opinions about what’s happening. This helps MC feel more real & adds clarity to what MC is lacking. Nice hints of fantasy elements to establish genre. By the end, still unsure what the MC wants to happen. What unanswered question will keep reader reading?

10queries

Q11 A F – No clear sense of MC’s personality. More about who the MC is might help reader connect better. Is change in MC’s life result of a decision or did it just happen to MC? Being specific about impactful changes would help reader understand motivation, conflict and dilemma.

10queries

P10 – A R Nice job revealing what’s important to MC. Wondering if the story starts in the right place…? Much of narrative & dialogue is relaying backstory. MC sitting around & reminiscing about past rather than actively working toward goal. Consider more focus on future plans.

10queries

It’s time for my 2nd batch of #RevPit #10Queries 😃 Quick reminder… 🧵I’ll continue the next round here 🧐Posts are purposely vague & hopefully helpful to everyone who’s #amquerying 📤I’ll email my picks after the #10Queries mini event ends 🤨 I’ll stick around for Q’s @ me

writingcommunity

New Agent Alert! Gemma Paynter has recently started acquiring at P.S. Literary. Gemma is looking for Adult fiction and non-fiction! Discover the full MSWL and how to query on our blog: www.writingdayworkshops.com/blog

10queries

10Sc – Q: Move the data paragraph at the top. Agents/etc will scan for that first. Make it easy for them 🙂 Don’t be afraid to showcase your voice in the query. Sentences are a bit choppy. P: Voice is strong. Great job. Minimize questions & speed up MC interacting with others.

10queries

9F – Q: This one was hard to parse quickly (which agents will be doing) due to wordiness & lack of paragraph indents. Aim to get your query between 300-350 words. P: As a spoonie, I always love to see disabled rep. Excellent descriptions. Early info should be weaved in later.

10queries

8F – Q: End your query with stakes, and even better, with a choice the MC must face so the agent/reader is compelled to read at minimum to that point. P: Amazing that you included the CW at the start. Starts a bit info heavy. Consider weaving it in naturally down the line.

10queries

7R – Q: Missing word count and bio. P: This one has an amazing log line that’s short in a good way and quippy. Consider mixing in some longer sentences and having more descriptions so the reader is grounded in the scene.

10queries

6Sc – Q: Aim to find more recent comps, as these are used by publishers to gauge marketability. If you do have older comps, perhaps limit it to one and state which aspect of it your novel shares. P: Intriguing concept! Prologue info best dispersed later. A serious CW isn’t listed.

10queries

5Sc – Q: Very well executed query letter. P: Consider having your first chapter be from the point of view of the main character as readers tend to invest most heavily in who they meet first, and will be expecting it 🙂

10queries

4R – Q: A quote attribution comes down the line. Consider including within the query itself. Include stakes. What happens if MC fails? What choice lies before them? P: I love the descriptions in this one. Brief and cinematic. The false start might annoy readers.

10queries

3F – Q: This one is missing comps. Agents will want to know what recent work yours is similar to. Example: the deep emotion of X and the lush descriptions of Y. P: Intriguing start! Consider adding more interiority and varying sentence length.

10queries

2F – Q: For clarity, and to show you can self-edit, aim to have fewer descriptive words. The agent’s eyes will be flying down the page. P: This is so voicey! Look out for repetition and cut anything the character says multiple times. A reminder down the line is okay.

10queries

1F – Q: Word count is high. For adult, aim for max 120k. Paper costs are high, and publishers’ perception is that reader attentions are lower post pandemic. P: I love how quippy this is! Reminder to have the character’s want communicated early.

10queries

Welcome to my first #RevPit #10Queries 🙂 Here are some brief thoughts on each of ten projects’ query letter and opening pages. If one is yours, you’ll be notified after RevPit winners are announced. All of this batch are in the adult age group. F=Fantasy, R=Romance, Sc=SciFi, Q=Query, P=Pages

writingcommunity

Curious about publishing timelines? After submission, it can take months for feedback. Patience is key, but follow-ups after 3 months are fair game. Stay proactive! 📚✍️

10queries

Hey! Just checking in. Wondering if you’ll be doing #10queries. This is my first year doing RevPit and I am not sure how all of this works.

pubtips

🦈 always good: https://queryshark.blogspot.com/2018/09/ original content not ours but by queryshark.blogspot.com

writingcommunity

Are you writing a thriller, mystery, cozy, suspense, or crime? Agent Ritu Anand is judging a new FREE contest for writers. Ends on April 20, 2026. Winner gets an agent critique! Enter here: tinyurl.com/wdwcontest11

writingcommunity

Join us for an evening with publishing expert Jane Friedman at the Writers Grotto! Learn about: • publishing myths • AI & authors • query letters • building your platform 📅 April 22, 6–8 PM 📍 SF Writers Grotto 🎟️ $45 writersgrotto.org

writingcommunity

As soon as you start handling your writing professionally, your self confidence will increase and your imposter syndrome will decrease. Document everything around your writing/stories. You list your top sales credits if you write a query for an agent. Be ready.

pubtips

Straight from the Slushwire 📫 scanner: “[QCrit] QUERY: THIS QUIET VIOLENCE 97K DARK FANTASY (FIRS…” https://www.reddit.com/r/PubTips/comments/1s5hr6r Tools for writers at https://writequeryhook.com

10queries

Yeah even tho I think one of the #10queries feedback was for me, I’m not gonna touch anything until they email the feedback to us after the waiting period. I don’t want to make any assumptions that could harm my work 😭

writingcommunity

“There’s no point in writing a great book if nobody knows it’s out there.” Historical mystery author C. A. Asbrey shares candid insights on writing, publishing, and book marketing in our latest WriteStats interview. Read more: writestats.com/c-a-asbrey-a…

10queries

Join @lauragalanwells.bsky.social for a #RevPit #10Queries session at 3 p.m. CST today!

MSWL

It’s no April fool’s joke…I’m officially reopening to queries with FinePrint’s Agency Assistant, @baileyknaub.bsky.social! We’re interested in: Indigenous Horror / Fantasy Speculative Thrillers Psychological Horror For the next 2 weeks, please submit to us via my QM form